fear


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hap2
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fear

Postby hap2 » Tue Aug 16, 2016 10:17 pm



Ever since I was rear ended (the bike was totaled) I'm becoming more & more fearful when I ride it. I wish I could fix that, but I dunno how. I don't have anybody close to ride with, so that doesn't help, even tho I just recently joined GWWRA. I really don't wanna sell it, tempted to put an ad out for bids over a certain amount butwill if I can't get the fear thing fixed. Just sayin. Feedback is welcome.



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Fiberthree
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Re: fear

Postby Fiberthree » Tue Aug 16, 2016 10:47 pm

How long ago did this happen?
I doubt that the intentions of the Wing wrecker were personal and I fully understand your apprehension about it happening again. How many years you have been riding motorcycles without such an accident should reassure you, somewhat, that even though there are countless moronic drivers out there, your experience was not the norm. Try short trips at first until you become more confident. It isn't going to be easy but once you get a few miles under your seat you'll enjoy it more.
Keep us informed.
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hap2
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Re: fear

Postby hap2 » Tue Aug 16, 2016 11:00 pm

I was rear ended 2 years ago. I've been riding bikes for probly close to 30 yrs w/o an accident until 2 yrs ago. I started off with a 200, then a 500 2-stroke, then a 650, then a 750, then a 1100, then a 1200, now this is a 2nd 1500 compliments of insurance $. Finding someone close whose confident will definitely help.

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Re: fear

Postby FM-USA » Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:09 am

I too was rear ended 2 years ago but I love to ride so much that I don't let the fear direct my life.
OH SURE, I'm more apprehensive now but this near life ending incident has made me that much more aware of my surroundings. The accident hasn't changed my riding style but has changed my habits a bit for whenever braking I now glance in my mirrors AS I'm grabbing for the brakes. This mirror glance has saved me several times in the past few years from being rear ended.

It's said when you fall off a horse, you get back on and ride. ;)
Since you're asking, your fear is more like apprehension. Questioning openly IS the first step to get back in the saddle.

Consider us the unseen friends that ride with you in spirit.
More importantly and this goes way beyond just riding... "Don't let fear direct your life."


.
Last edited by FM-USA on Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:22 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: fear

Postby dingdong » Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:21 am

I hope you find a solution to your fear problem. I can empathize with you. I am beginning to develop a fear of what I can't see ahead of me. I haven't had a serious accident so that isn't my problem. Going around a blind curve at speed or even topping a steep hill is my problem. I have had a slew of near misses in the recent past in those situations. Cages crossing the center line into my lane. This hasn't stopped me from riding but it sure causes me to slow down and ride much slower and to be overly cautious in those situations. Good luck to you!
Tom

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Re: fear

Postby FM-USA » Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:28 am

Fine post dingdong. What can be learned from your points is, learn to 'read' what others are doing before they do it.
A sudden tell-tail lateral movement of a vehicle next to you hints they're possibly about to lane change or spilled drink or worse, TEXTING.
A vehicle coming from the side isn't slowing down, time to get ready before the situation occurs.
LOOK in your mirrors first when braking.
etc., etc..

"Cages crossing the center line into my lane."
THAT'S a tough one to thwart since the time to react is cut in half. Only advice I can offer at this time is, others chime in, always have an OUT when traffic is around you. If you don't have one, make one. 8-)
Situation example:
Couple days ago this cage was on my left pacing me. I speed up or slow a little it still paced me. What I did at that time was honk my horn and left hand motioned it to move along. It took a good long second to sink in, and they moved on.
HINT: In many situations, don't make eye contact, it's misconstrued as being offensive or combative. ;)

.
Last edited by FM-USA on Wed Aug 17, 2016 9:35 am, edited 1 time in total.
"OIL CHANGE?" _FM 07-2009
Know its new taste and be loyal, you'll know when to change that oil.
Taste testing as the miles flow, souring as that acid grows.
And don't flirt with dirt or darkened oil, all the faster your engine will spoil.

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Re: fear

Postby NVSB4 » Wed Aug 17, 2016 8:06 am

I suggest, since you are part of GWRRA, that you reach out to your local chapter and their Chapter Educator.
Perhaps a Rider's Ed course would help boost your confidence.

Chapter: Chapter AB-A (Calgary)
Director: Gary & Susan Premech
Website: GWRRA Chapter AB-A

It appears that they have rides scheduled for every weekend.
Riding with a group of other people would serve both your qualms.
It would give a chance to ride with other, possibly more experienced riders and there is always "strength in numbers".
The GWRRA motto is "Friends for Fun, Safety and Knowledge".
It sounds like you could use a little of each.
It's never too late to have a happy childhood!

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Re: fear

Postby minimac » Wed Aug 17, 2016 8:52 am

Where you ride will or will not help. If almost entirely in the city, with lots of start and stop traffic, that won't help get over it. Out on the road, touring you'll be able to relax. Nothing wrong with staying vigilant, but being scared to ride is not good.

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Re: fear

Postby hap2 » Wed Aug 17, 2016 8:57 am

Ya, but the fear the the pavement changing, or even a long crack or crevice in the pavement, or worse yet, construction & gravel (I'm petrified of gravel) is there now.

I was thinking, I could trike it, but then it wudn't b a bike & I'm not sure if that wud b better or not. KInda pricy to to do that. I'd like to find a place to try a trike before I decide.

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Re: fear

Postby FM-USA » Wed Aug 17, 2016 9:45 am

hap2 wrote:Ya, but the fear the the pavement changing, or even a long crack or crevice in the pavement, or worse yet, construction & gravel (I'm petrified of gravel) is there now.

I was thinking, I could trike it, but then it wudn't b a bike & I'm not sure if that wud b better or not. KInda pricy to to do that. I'd like to find a place to try a trike before I decide.


When pavement changes oh say asphalt to concrete, you just keep going. The centrifugal mass of the bike will keep it in a straight line AS LONG AS you didn't input something into the bars. Many times loosening up your 'death grip' allows the bike to do what it was designed to do, stay upright and straight.
Gravel you already seen it coming and should be slowing down. Dirt bikes can handle gravel at speed, heavy road bikes can't, they want to dig in. Most road gravel is fairly packed where the car tires are, that gives you a good base to ride. It's the loose stuff in the middle and edges that's loose. To me, IF I'm going down I'd rather be on relativity soft gravel than hard, "skin removing", pavement. But I don't make it a habit to ride gravel roads anymore. It was fun for a while but dust is hard to remove inside the bike.

A long crack:
Believe it or not, loosen your grip. The bike wants to stay fairly straight and upright. "Don't fight it Luke, let the centrifugal force be with you." Go find an empty road with a crack and test ride it at different speeds. You'll get used to and understand the bikes actions and reactions.
"The GoldWing was designed to be perfect, until a rider climbs aboard."

SO..... what else ya got we can help with? :)

.
"OIL CHANGE?" _FM 07-2009
Know its new taste and be loyal, you'll know when to change that oil.
Taste testing as the miles flow, souring as that acid grows.
And don't flirt with dirt or darkened oil, all the faster your engine will spoil.

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Re: fear

Postby thrasherg » Wed Aug 17, 2016 10:05 am

Also if your fear is of being rear-ended again, you might want to try installing one of the electrical boxes that flash the brake lights when you apply the brakes, most cars seem to take more notice and stop a bit further back. It certainly can't help and might give you a bit more confidence! Good luck getting back on the horse.

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Re: fear

Postby harvey01 » Wed Aug 17, 2016 12:54 pm

I certainly agree with the suggestion to get additional training through GWRRA especially if you have never taken a rider course. I don't know which issue of Rider Magazine but Eric Trow the head of Staying Safe has some great suggestions of ways to communicate with vehicles behind us as we stop.

Many folks are able to be involved in such incidents and as FM-USA notes they are able to get past it due to their love of riding. For some of us it is just not that simple.

All the training in the world may not overcome the fear. I would urge you to consider getting some professional help from a psychiatrist. They deal with patients with this type of problem frequently and usually can really help. I realize there is cost involved so you sort of have to weigh it against how much you value riding. Professional help can get you past this fear before it becomes an obsessive thing and you are afraid whether in the car or the bike.

This type of mental health counseling is available through many job benefit plans as well as in many communities.

Good luck in your recovery and I hope you enjoy many miles of happy riding.
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Re: fear

Postby hap2 » Wed Aug 17, 2016 1:01 pm

The suggestion to research what u said Eric Trow suggested is a good idea. Also taking a course. But I guess the bottom line is I don't quite enjoy it anymore, so I'm making up an ad to just sell it & be done with it.

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Re: fear

Postby FM-USA » Wed Aug 17, 2016 2:06 pm

All I can say is, give it a little more time, let the mishap become a faded memory.
The Wing will always be there for you, yearning for your return.
You know she can't go anywhere without you. :|

(if Elvis rode a Wing, he'd sing...)
She wants you,.. she needs you,.. she's lonely without you. :cry:
"OIL CHANGE?" _FM 07-2009
Know its new taste and be loyal, you'll know when to change that oil.
Taste testing as the miles flow, souring as that acid grows.
And don't flirt with dirt or darkened oil, all the faster your engine will spoil.

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Re: fear

Postby themainviking » Wed Aug 17, 2016 4:48 pm

I have had several accidents, none life threatening or altering, but lost flesh and mobility, and took up to seven months to heal from one of them. I never allowed it to control how I live my life. I was in the army and went through more harrowing incidents than motorcycle accidents, so maybe that is the reason I do not fear. Like was mentioned, a healthy sense of apprehension is a good thing. I ride now like it ain't yet my time to go. When it is, then away I go. I am coming up 68 years old, and have (so far) had a good life, but when its over - its over. I do not ride as if I am suicidal by any means, but I do ride aggressively so that I am in control of my situations. Like you, my accidents - two out of three fairly major ones - have been from some buttwipe rear ending me, and knocking me down. As was mentioned, I spend a lot of time checking out the rearview, and I leave myself a clear out when stopped in traffic. If it looks like someone ain't stopping behind me, I will split lanes or curb jump to get out of the way. I hate to see anyone who was hurt badly enough to instill fear into them, so I hope you can overcome it. One poster mentioned getting with the GWRRA Educator of your chapter, and that is a good idea. Some PLP (Parking Lot Practice) can go a long way towards relieving you of this fear. The more you ride, the more comfortable you will get back to being. Heck man - nobody lives forever, Bwahahahaha.
It ain't about the destination - it's all about the journey

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Re: fear

Postby hap2 » Wed Aug 17, 2016 5:22 pm

Thank u. I appreciate the feedback / encouragement.

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Re: fear

Postby FM-USA » Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:58 pm

hap2 wrote:Thank u. I appreciate the feedback / encouragement.

SOOooo you're saying your not giving up yet? :)
"OIL CHANGE?" _FM 07-2009
Know its new taste and be loyal, you'll know when to change that oil.
Taste testing as the miles flow, souring as that acid grows.
And don't flirt with dirt or darkened oil, all the faster your engine will spoil.

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Re: fear

Postby hap2 » Wed Aug 17, 2016 8:26 pm

Nope, I don't quit easy, but again after > 30 years it's not as enjoyable as it once was & just looking at options.

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Re: fear

Postby Happytrails » Wed Aug 17, 2016 8:56 pm

Would say go with your gut feeling. Its usually right. Any reasonable person has there own idea about acceptable risk. If its unacceptable to yourself then you need to change something. It could be adding a brake light modulator or more LED's. You could try to learn more about avoiding being hit from behind by doing some researching. Or maybe step away from riding for awhile until something changes like moving to a different area. I stopped riding for a few years because I didn't feel good with the risks and the area I lived in. I was in the city of Pittsburgh and riding was amazing scary. Years later I moved to the country and bought a Goldwing. I always considered myself to be a good rider and level headed. But the diference for me now is I feel so much smarter when it comes to street survival and managing the risks. But having someone run into me from behind at a stoplight is still a worry. Good luck with making your decision. :D
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Re: fear

Postby hap2 » Wed Aug 17, 2016 9:14 pm

HappyTrails:
Right u r on all accts.

I just hope I can sell it, but whatever; so I'm willing keep it but certainly ain't gonna lose any $ or give it away.

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Re: fear

Postby FM-USA » Wed Aug 17, 2016 10:15 pm

Happytrails wrote:Would say go with your gut feeling. Its usually right. ... Or maybe step away from riding for awhile until something changes like moving to a different area. I stopped riding for a few years because I didn't feel good with the risks and the area I lived in. ...
Good luck with making your decision. :D

Dittoes, on your decision.

Believe it or not, today I had that bad feeling about the risks in the area I lived in. On the way home I also contemplated where to move to. Now I read this. :shock:
Coincidence? Hardly, almost everyone has those feelings, the wonder ifs, the doubts sometime.
I'm taking stock of what's left of my future, or time left, now that I'm retired. In the 4 viable bikes I've had, I've logged about 1/2 Million miles just in the lower 48 States. Well over a million if I add the cars and vans. I've seen most of the major attractions and landmarks. But I haven't logged on the old roads of yesteryear, the byroads that Super-Slabs pass by. Just out of diapers I vaguely remember those old roads from the back seat of our big wing '58 Plymouth and the tight squeeze of the early 50's Nash wagon. The dry heat, dusty roads and older bro's & sis's complaining of said heat and laughing as they ran stretching there stiff legs. Mom crying cause dad got too close to a steep cliff drop off and dad laughing saying, "It's just your side of the car that will go down dear." The rare fuel stops and having to pass around the pee can. :lol:
One could say I want to go back to my childhood, maybe, or maybe I want to feel "THOSE DAYS" of freedom again. Take the time to stop and talk to the old folks along the way. (sigh)
... .. . . .
hap2, are you sure your ready to retire, or is the apprehension dictating what to do?

.
Last edited by FM-USA on Wed Aug 17, 2016 10:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"OIL CHANGE?" _FM 07-2009
Know its new taste and be loyal, you'll know when to change that oil.
Taste testing as the miles flow, souring as that acid grows.
And don't flirt with dirt or darkened oil, all the faster your engine will spoil.

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Re: fear

Postby hap2 » Wed Aug 17, 2016 10:22 pm

I'm not sure I wanna retire,but I am sure I wanna start making plans to enjoy everyday. I'm like u when it comes to wanting to go back to childhood. Can't do that, but can make plans to enjoy life..& ur never too old to do that.

Maybe I'll just keep the bike,cuz then just in case I meet another "biker" to travel & enjoy life with, I can.

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iRide 24/365 99% SmileMiles
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"You don't buy yourself a
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HD friends PACIFIED."
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ANTAGONISTS need not post.
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Re: fear

Postby FM-USA » Wed Aug 17, 2016 10:26 pm

"OIL CHANGE?" _FM 07-2009
Know its new taste and be loyal, you'll know when to change that oil.
Taste testing as the miles flow, souring as that acid grows.
And don't flirt with dirt or darkened oil, all the faster your engine will spoil.

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hap2
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Re: fear

Postby hap2 » Wed Aug 17, 2016 10:37 pm

Roger that good buddy.

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Re: fear

Postby CrystalPistol » Thu Aug 18, 2016 6:59 pm

hap2 wrote:Nope, I don't quit easy, but again after > 30 years it's not as enjoyable as it once was & just looking at options.


That's because like us, you were once 10 feet tall and bullet proof .....
..... but we never were really.

If you really don't enjoy riding, then it is maybe "time". But if you still do enjoy riding and if you are still of sound mind and body that allow riding .... time to deal with it.

I agree with others, some rider training never hurt any rider, not even an old has been like us. Good to sharpen skills, heighten awareness, relearn old lessons long forgotten. Advanced or Experienced Rider Courses, whether GWRRA or other are good for that. Good for sitting in a group of others, some of whom share the feelings you do .... and talk and learn ways to counter that with skill. Challenges are what make us better. Someday we all leave this world, but don't let fear rule your life until.


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